If you're new to the role of caregiver, you may be in total shock. Nothing in life really prepares you for the role of caregiver unless you're already associated with the medical or psychiatric care field.
But you can draw on many past lessons and skills to aid you. Here are a few:
1) What you learned in Sunday School.
Many of us have had some background in church or in some type of religious organization. In most of those we studied what is termed in common everyday language as, "The Golden Rule: do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Even if you've never had experience as a caregiver, you can make an educated guess as to how your loved one would like to be treated.
2) What you learned at work.
Many of us have spent some time working at a job. You probably learned that you have to treat people civily and with a bit of respect to get along. The same goes for your sick one now. They only want to be treated with dignity and concern for their welfare. Plus, if you're really getting into this, consider that they want to be valued and want to feel worthy.
A person with Fibromyalgia (FMS) or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) at times may not be able to do much, but he or she is still a person who really needs you! If you don't say or do anything to "de-value" your loved one, they will survive with a more intact, healthy sense of self-worth, which supports them in the process of getting well.
3) What you learned from being with your buddies or girlfriends, whichever the case may be.
You laugh, poke fun, giggle and tell jokes with your best friends. Do the same with your sick loved one when the timing is right. It will help them feel normal to be able to understand and laugh at a joke. Humor is infectious in a good way!
I promised you my thoughts and a tally on my role as recent caregiver and these things came to mind. My husband is still not on his feet, but there are times when we can do things together and he feels "worthy." When he feels down and tired, we both rest together. And I've needed that down-time, too.
Yes, I'm needing some extra rest. I wish you peace, happiness and rest today.
Cinda Crawford, host of the Health Matters Show
